The 5-to-9
Bob Newhart was so right
Good morning! What’s on tap today:
An unexpected way to improve your job.
One of the best films on leadership I’ve ever seen.
Did I just start a middle management lifestyle brand?
Bottom line up front: I discovered that my job wasn’t making my life hard; my lack of self-control outside of work was making my job hard.
“American culture has gone the wrong way about getting happier—by encouraging each of us to relax self-control to get happier, the unfortunate result is that we have become unhappier as a whole and are now stuck that way.”
—Arthur Brooks, The Happiness Files
In 2001, the late Bob Newhart guest-starred on an episode of MADtv.
He played a no-nonsense psychiatrist whose appointments only lasted five minutes because he gave the same advice no matter the problem:
Stop it.
Patient: When I think about being buried alive in a box, it makes me scared.
Newhart: Stop it.
Patient: I’m struggling to eat healthy.
Newhart: Stop it.
Patient: I’m struggling to have healthy relationships.
Newhart: Stop it.
Newhart was funny, but he was also right.
Earlier this month, I was listening to Arthur Brooks’ The Happiness Files and was surprised to learn that Newhart’s advice aligns with actual research. Studies found that low levels of self-control were associated with the lowest levels of well-being. As self-control increased, happiness increased right along with it.
Said another way:
If you want to be happier, stop it.
That’s not my opinion.
That’s science.
However, it’s also been my experience.
I don’t talk about this much, but the last two years have been the healthiest of my life—physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
Why?
Because I stopped a bunch of stuff.
I stopped drinking.
I stopped eating dessert every night.
I stopped reaching for snacks every time I was bored.
I stopped sleeping through my alarm.
I stopped hoarding my ideas.
I stopped being offended by everything.
I stopped trying to control other people.
I stopped making excuses.
I stopped waiting for tomorrow.
When I stopped all that stuff, my well-being increased, exactly like the research said it would. My work and my life both improved.
Do you see that connection? Changing my 5-to-9 had a positive impact on my 9-to-5.
Here’s my conclusion: If you want your 9-to-5 to improve, it will probably start with your 5-to-9.
For years, I believed one of my biggest problems was work. I’d drive home frustrated, convinced that if something (or someone) at work would change, then my life would get easier.
Once home, I’d eat like crap, watch TV, sip bourbon, stay up too late because I “needed some me time,” hit snooze four times, scramble the next morning, and barely make my first meeting.
Every “stop it” idea felt like a drop in the bucket.
What difference would going to bed on time really make?
How does skipping dessert help my to-do list?
So I did nothing and kept blaming my 9-to-5 while ignoring my 5-to-9.
Then, in 2023, I’d had enough. I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror (literally or metaphorically).
On September 10, 2023, I finally took Bob Newhart’s advice. I said “stop it” to alcohol, late nights, and inactivity.
At first, nothing dramatic happened.
Then everything changed.
I handled stress better.
I had more energy.
I listened better.
My mood improved.
My ideas got sharper.
My clothes fit better.
The “drop in the bucket” wasn’t a drop at all. A little self-control in my 5-to-9 had an outsized impact on my 9-to-5.
Two years later, my life is completely different.
I used to think my job was making my life hard.
Now I know better.
My life was making my job hard.
That’s the point I’m trying to make.
One of the most unexpected ways to change your 9-to-5 is to focus on your 5-to-9.
If you want more happiness—and a better work life—take Bob Newhart’s advice.
Stop it.
The Year of Movies
In my last email of 2025, I mentioned that this year I plan to read fewer books and watch more movies. So far, I’m absolutely dominating that plan.
The combination of the holidays, colder weather, shorter days, and the absence of a sports team worth emotionally investing in has created the perfect conditions for some great films.
If you find yourself with a little extra time and want to get pulled into a good story, here are a few I’d recommend:
Wake Up Dead Man (Netflix)
My favorite of the three Knives Out films. Smart, playful, and exactly what a good whodunit should be.
Worth (Netflix)
This movie does what most leadership books can’t. It shows what leadership, judgment, and diplomacy look like when the stakes are real and the answers aren’t clean.
The Life of Chuck (Hulu)
Absolutely stunning. Stephen King somehow keeps delivering great stories in completely unexpected ways. This was adapted from one of his short stories. No horror here (think The Shawshank Redemption or Stand by Me). I loved it so much I watched it twice in the same week.
Planning an Event This Year?
If your (or anyone you know) is planning an event this year, I’d love to be a part of it!
Want Some Foggy Swag?
I’ll share more details in my next email, but know this, everyone who preorders The Fog of Work between now and April 14th will receive some cool Fog of Work swag. Let’s just say, I might have accidentally started the first lifestyle brand for managers and I plan to share it.
Here’s a little teaser:
Preorder here
Before you go…
After watching The Life of Chuck, my wife and I went on a YouTube spiral watching videos of Tom Hiddleston dancing. I think that’s a confession.
There is zero chance Kyle Tucker is worth $60 million a year. Yes, my opinion of him is based solely on the fact he used to play for the Houston Astros. But that doesn’t mean I’m wrong.
I rejoined Instagram. It is the New York City of social media apps.
One of the best ways you can support my work is to share it with your friends and co-workers. Please use the share button below to make that happen.
Thanks for reading!
-Adam
Great post, Adam! +1 for Agency. 🙂