The Middle Isn’t Miserable: Here’s Proof
Why the Middle Matters More Than We Think
The Top Five Middles
“All change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and so beautiful at the end.” - Robin Sharma.
Writing a book for middle managers has me thinking a lot about “middles” lately.
As someone who has a habit of either dwelling on the past (Why did I do that?) or jumping ahead to the future (I can’t wait until…), I don’t naturally spend a lot of time focused on the middle; the now.
Here’s a quick example:
My youngest son turns 16 next August. That’s August 2026, sixteen months from today.
We plan to let him drive the car I’m currently using, which means next August, I’ll be in the market for a new car.
For some reason, that future event is all I can think about today. I’m studying every car I see on the road, asking people for recommendations, and reading Consumer Reports like it’s my second job.
I’m ignoring today and pre-living what life might look like next August.
That’s not planning.
That’s foolishness.
So yeah, I’m not great at focusing on the middle.
But writing this book has opened my eyes.
I’m starting to realize there are some fantastic middles out there.
My definitive list of the Top Five Middles:
5. The Middle of an Oreo Cookie
An obvious classic. No shame if you twist them apart, eat the crème, and give the sad, dry cookies to your little brother (or youngest child).
4. The Middle of a Great Song
Structurally, it’s called “the bridge.” The emotional lift, the surprise turn, the hold-your-breath moment before the final chorus.
Think: “Strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard…” from Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’.
3. The Brownie from the Middle of the Pan
This one will cost me some subscribers, but it must be said: Those of you who prefer edge pieces need help. You must be the kid brother who ended up with all the crème-less Oreos. There’s simply no other explanation for your preferences.
2. The Middle of a Fairway
In golf, there’s no better place to be. When you hit the middle of the fairway, you feel equal parts proud, hopeful, and safe. If I were better at golf, this would probably be #1. But alas, for obvious reasons, it’s #2.
1. The Middle of a Cinnamon Roll
Proof that God exists and He wants us to be happy. Words fail. If you know, you know. The undisputed greatest middle in the world.
Now, of course, there are terrible middles too:
The middle seat on an airplane.
The middle seat in the back of a car (a spot typically reserved for that kid brother)
Standing crammed in the middle of a crowded elevator.
But not every middle is miserable.
Some people would add middle management to the list of terrible middles.
I disagree.
Some middles are worth celebrating, and I believe middle management is one of them.
A Few Important Truths About Middles
If you find yourself in the middle of your career—or in middle management—here are a few truths to remember. They may be obvious, but they’re easy to forget when you’re caught in the hustle and pressure of everyday life.
1. The Middle Is Difficult for Everyone
If you feel like your job is hard—really, really hard—you are not broken.
You are not the exception.
Every middle manager I’ve ever met has felt overwhelmed, overworked, and out of options at some point.
Remember: Struggling in the middle doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong.
2. The Middle Is Where the Meaning Is
Going through the middle isn’t hazing.
It’s not punishment.
It’s not “paying your dues” on the way to something better.
The middle is where real growth happens.
It’s where skills turn into wisdom.
It’s where ego gives way to character.
Remember: The middle is not a waiting room. It’s the workshop. It’s a rite of passage.
3. The Middle Is Not the End
This is simple but powerful.
The middle is not the end.
You’re not finished… you’re just in the middle.
Remember: Your story is still being written.
4. Everyone Who Reaches the Top Goes Through the Middle
You can’t skip the middle part of your story.
You can change companies.
You can change bosses.
You can change industries.
But if you don’t learn the lessons the middle is trying to teach, the middle will find you again, just with different faces and different logos.
Remember: The middle isn’t a place you escape; it’s a place you learn how to navigate.
5. The Real Lesson of the Middle: Becoming a Wayfinder.
Wayfinders were expert navigators, most famously in Polynesian culture, who could sail vast distances across the ocean without maps or modern instruments. They used the stars, waves, wind, birds, and cloud patterns to read their environment and determine direction. They didn’t just follow a path…they discovered it.
The middle isn’t just a tough season; it’s a training ground.
It’s where you stop waiting for direction and start creating it.
It’s where you learn how to find a way forward, especially when the way isn’t obvious.
The middle is where you transition from someone looking for a way out to someone who finds a way through. The middle teaches you to be a Wayfinder.
Remember: The only way out… is through.
Final Thought
Some middles are hard (middle seat on an airplane).
Some are good (middle of a cinnamon roll).
And some are both hard and good (middle management).
Of course, we all want more of the good and less of the hard.
But when you find yourself in a middle that’s both—don’t waste it looking for a way out.
Something is happening in the middle that’s essential to your growth, your development, and your future influence.
Your story isn’t over.
The middle is trying to show you how to find a way through.
Don’t get so overwhelmed by the hard that you miss the good.
It’s there.
And when you find it, you’ll realize you didn’t just survive a tough season—you became someone different.
You became a Wayfinder.
April Reads & Ratings…
I finished up seven books this month. Three notable titles that you might find interesting:
Walt Disney - Neal Gabler (Audible) (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)
If you’re a fan of The Walt Disney Company, you’ll love this book. I had no idea Walt navigated so much adversity. The behind-the-scenes stories of the classic films were fascinating, but even more inspiring was his perseverance and work ethic. His title as an American icon was well earned.
The Referrable Speaker – Michael Port & Andrew Davis (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)
If you have even a hint of desire to earn a living from public speaking, this is a must-read. It’s my first five-star book of the year, though I should warn you, it’s a niche read. My only regret is not reading it five years ago. Everything they advise you not to do…I’ve already done. So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.
The Captain Class – Sam Walker (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️½)
One of the most unique books on leadership I’ve ever read. If you enjoy sports and leadership, this book strikes the perfect balance. Walker’s premise: The true secret behind the greatest, most dominant teams isn’t superstar talent, brilliant coaching, or cutting-edge strategy. It’s the presence of a very particular kind of leader—an exceptional captain who transforms the team from within.
⏰ Tarnow’s “Worth Your Time” Recommendation of the Month
The Captain Class by Sam Walker
Most Popular Podcast Episode…
This month’s most popular episode was How to Stop Caring What People Think of You. Relevant for both teenagers and leaders!
Thanks for reading…What fantastic middle would you add to my list?
See you again next month!
-Adam
I love everything about this! Thank you!